I despise school with a fiery passion of a thousand suns. I loved learning, but hated all things related to institutionalized education. Something about being cooped up in an ugly, badly temperature-controlled building, having to ask permission to use the bathroom, being told what was or was not appropriate to:

read - Stephen King - not appropriate reading material for a 6th grader;

eat - Peanut butter and jelly everyday is not healthy!
drink - Milk is a better alternative to Pepsi; and

wear - Vans are not the rubber soled shoes we referred to when referring to appropriate foot attire for P.E. class.

In 7th grade I got in trouble for going to the library (the library!) without a pass in order to finish the research on a Social Studies paper instead of sitting through the remaining 45 minutes of my lunch period in the cafeteria gossiping with my friends.

I didn’t actually start liking school until college. Even then, it was a stretch. Especially on most Thursdays of my 2nd semester when my Corporate Finance professor couldn’t be bothered showing up to teach a class that I left my house at 6:45 a.m. to attend. Yes, I’m talking to you Dr. Battista, jerk.

I didn’t think my hatred of all things school-related could be any deeper until this year.

• School started almost 2 weeks later this year on August 28th and will end on June 4th or 5th. The goal is for the schools in Texas to have the first day of school be the day after Labor Day like most of the rest of the country and thus ending in the second or third week of June like most of the rest of the country. That’s all well and good, but, um in mid-June, it’s almost 100° here, unlike most of the rest of the country.
• The dress code is out of fucking control this year. Don’t even get me started.
• Gaz is in fifth grade. Fifth grade sucks.
• Hallway Math

Last week at 5th orientation, we were told about this thing called Hallway Math. Up until now, I thought Hallway Math was an urban legend. You know, like how third grade is sooooooo hard (um, not).Well, Hallway Math is this really cryptic math exercise that the kids have to do in the morning before the bell rings at 7:55 a.m. Yes, you read correctly, before school actually starts.

I know, right?

I’ve never really been a morning person. ever. I suck at math. I can’t imagine what sheer torture it must be to have to to math before 7:55 a.m. In a hallway full of kids. With no coffee involved. Poor Gaz.
I hate school.